Next time I make a snarky comment about my parents’ larger than life television, remind me that I found Fraggle Rock on one of the thousand channels this morning, and it totally warmed my heart.
And if I wasn’t unemployed and bumming off my parents right now, I most likely would have missed the baby deer walking through the gently falling snow in the neighbors’ backyard.
For whatever reason, I’m suddenly feeling content to be here. Maybe it’s because I’m finally caught up on writing about Perú, three weeks after leaving. Maybe because I’ve been really good about exercising recently. Maybe because I started drawing instead of face-stalking my free time away. Who knows?
I was having a really hard time adjusting to being back home after roaming freely around Perú for darn near five months. I deliberately avoided job searching before coming home because I wanted to relax and enjoy the holidays. However, that left me with not much to do after the holidays. When everyone else went back to work on January 3, I probably slept until 11 am. I was sinking into a depression, but I’m quite certain I’ve pulled myself out before it got too bad.
I’ve gone through phases already. At first, when family and friends asked “What are you going to do now?” I would smile and announce, “I have no idea!” like it was the best thing ever. But then, slowly but surely, the reality that I was no longer surrounded by free spirited nomads started to sink in. You see.. people round these parts, they don’t respect a response like that. In fact, they see it as a problem.
“Well, you need to remember that you have to make a living!”my great uncle reminded me about 100 times.
“I don’t need much to live,” I’d respond.
Then he’d look very sad.
Erm, since when does one need a six figure salary to get by? It’s so funny what other people think is important. Not even important, but necessary. When I told my cousin how much little I used to earn at Princeton (hey, there’s a reason I had a weekend job!) her eyes bugged out of her head and she asked how I did it! I started to let this get to me. I started to feel like a loser, but then I realized exactly what was going on here.
In general, the ones that are nagging me are the ones that exist in a comfortable little bubble. A very, very little bubble. The fast-food eating, reality TV show watching, measuring success by the size of your paycheck world that far too many people never break out of.
What would they like me to do? Get a job that I’m not at all excited about, but too afraid to quit because of the security it provides? Spend my money on nice things to fill up my apartment with? Pay someone to take care of things for me instead of learning how to do it myself? If this is your thing, then rock on with it, but personally, it sounds terrible to me. I refuse to be pulled into this pit of despair.
Since deciding to quit my comfy cushy job full-time, I’ve knocked some major items off my list of things to do before I die. Don’t confuse “making money” with “making a living.” I believe I’m quite good at that.
awesome points and post, Lauren! They just don’t get it but I’m glad you’ve figured it out. That said…be careful to protect yourself for the future…that’s probably what most of your family is worried about! :)